GENDER'ISM'

The lady sat across me on a chair with the four month old baby in her lap.
She came for vaccination of the baby.Baby’s vaccination card was empty
except for a hepatitis B vaccine.Dates for other vaccines according to schedule
were recorded in the card but not given. The lady appeared around 55 yrs old.
I guessed the child is not her own.She understood my doubt and smiled.
“yes doc.this is my grand child.It was born four months back.its mother is not well
she is mentally ill and under treatment.She is with her parents.so I have to look after the baby.
I smiled back.”ok.so no injections given to baby till this time?’I asked.
“I think one is given.The baby was with mother at her home.I brought it yesterday only .you know I am a poor woman.My son is just a salesman in a shop.He is a very unlucky chap.He is only 27. This is his second marriage.Poor fellow.
I became curious.Being a doctor doesn’t prohibit you from liking gossip a bit and probing is a part of our job too.
“so what happened to the first wife?” I asked.
“ohh..thats a sad story.She ran away with her lover one month after the marriage.
She was involved with him before the marriage.”
My curiosity increased.The woman understood and continued.
“after that incident my son was not inclined to marry again .but we compelled him.
and arranged another marriage.she is 35 yrs old.this baby’s mother.
She stopped and looked the baby on her lap with a smile.baby was sleeping calmly in her arms.
Then she continued without waiting for my response.
“ that was also another bad luck.we didn’t know before the marriage that she is suffering from mental illness.they hide this from us.she was ill since many years
she shouts and runaway at times and will not talk for days at other times.”
From the description I felt the mother may be suffering from Manic Depressive Psychosis.
“her illness increased after the delivery.we thought she would kill the baby.so I brought it to my house”woman told me.”
“Is it a boy?”I asked.
This is a question comes to me naturally after living in this area and seeing patients
For many years.sometimes one can makeout the gender of the babies even from the way older women of the families hold the babies in their arms in this locality.
She described the birth of this baby.Her daughter in law went out from home saying
she is going to her sister’s place.after 2 days policemen came to her doorsteps and asked “where is your daughter in law?”she ddnt know.after a few minutes of drama
they revealed her location.she was found in a pavement in labour painstthe police took her to nearby hospital. she delivered at the reception area of the hospital in the stretcher.baby was 1.5 kg .it survived.
That day I proceeded with injection and gave instructions about further visits.
Then she started regularly coming at the given intervals with the baby.From the next visit onwards she started whining on every visit about her difficulties in looking after the baby.She also tried to sisters to reduce the on the cost of vaccination .
When I tell her about the side effects of vaccines like fever etc she will say”ohh god!
How am I going to manage?I have to make food and look after the baby alone.Nobody to help.”
“Its ok. This occur with every babies.”I tried to comfort her.
She was not happy”still its very difficult for me to spend this amount of money”she
GrumpleS.
“Then why don’t you give the baby back to her mother and relatives?”
I asked her one day.
“How can I do that !”came prompt reply.
“Its boy.if it was a girl …”she ddnt complete the sentence.
I ddnt say anything.as I never understood why do many famales hate female babies and prefer male babies..

Thus this is the history of this baby.It is lucky at least that it is born as a male in India.
I have seen many other less privileged one’s called females struggling for their survival.The level of baby care is decided by its gender in many parts of India and if it is born as a female before getting killed in the womb the rest of its life path is mostly determined by the presence or absence of sheer luck.